Reasons why A Knight’s Tale is awesome:
1. Heath Ledger. While he’s not my all time favourite thing about this movie, he’s completely adorable.
2. The entire supporting cast as a whole. Perfection.
3. Chaucer distracting Count Adhemar’s herald during his introduction with a mirror and the sun.
4. The farting competition in the end credits to see who’ll buy the next round.
5. Paul Bettany. Hands down my favourite thing in this movie. He steals pretty much every scene he’s in, and I’m totally okay with that.
6. The soundtrack. It’s made of awesome.
7. Singing English football songs about jousting. “Geeeelderland, Gelderland, Gelderlaaaand…” Genius.
8. Heath Ledger singing. We all know how great that was from 10 Things I Hate About You!
9. Alan Tudyk (WASH!!!!) and Mark Addy.
10. Teaching William to dance.
11. The scene where they test the armour using a battering ram-y thing.
12. Mini William. He’s adorable.
13. Rufus Sewell. Has he ever NOT played a douche-y bad guy??
14. The training montage.
15. The reunion between William and his father. .
16. James Purefoy as the Black Prince.
17. A Medieval Mexican wave.
18. Laura Fraser as Kate. It’s always nice to see a kickass female character who can hold her own in a Medieval-y movie!
19. Jocelyn’s ridiculous hats. And costumes. And hairstyles.
20. The banquet.
21. How Ulrich/William’s outfit for the banquet is made out of the tent. How very Sound of Music!!
22. The montage where he intentionally loses to prove his love for Jocelyn.
23. The ridiculously stereotypical Frenchman at the pub in Paris.
24. Everybody loves an underdog story.
25. Riding a horse into the cathedral.
Plus, the following quotes:
– “I think he’s getting worse…” “He IS getting worse…”
– “How stylish of you to joust in an antique!”
– “You have been weighed.” “You have been measured.” “And you have absolutely” “Been found wanting” “[grin] Welcome
to the new world.”
– “And one and two and three and four, and Wat doesn’t lead, he follows like a girl! [Wat punches him]”
– “Better a silly girl with a flower than a silly boy with a horse and a stick.” “It’s called a lance. HELLOOOO!!”
– “To trudge: the slow, weary, depressing yet determined walk of a man who has nothing left in his life except the impulse to simply soldier on.”
– “Uh, betray us, and I will fong you, until your insides are out, your outsides are in, your entrails will become your extrails I will w-rip… all the p… ung. Pain, lots of pain!”
– “I will eviscerate you in fiction. Every pimple, every character flaw. I was naked for a day, you will be naked for eternity.”
– “She makes me feel like a poet.” “You may feel like a poet, but you sound like an idiot !! ”
– “Oh, my giddy aunt…”
– [Bishop presents ring to be kissed] “Oh, that is LOVELY!”
– “I thought you was a prostitute!!”
– “It’s your funeral…uh, letter.”
– “What do you mean, DEAD?” “The spark of his life is smothered in shite. His spirit is gone, but his stench remains. Does that answer your question??”
– “Good people! I missed my introduction. But please… Please, I pray you, hear it now. For I would lay rest the grace in my tongue and speak plainly. Days like these are far too rare to cheapen with heavy handed words. And so, I’m afraid, without any ado whatsoever…Excuse me, my Lord… Here he is, one of your own. Born a stone’s throw from this very stadium, and here before you now. The son of John Thatcher, Sir Wiiiiiiiilliam THATCHER!!”